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08/01/2019
Once upon a time, life training had taught me that to be in this world, and to truly get anywhere, you had to be busy. Isn’t that what everyone I knew was? BUSY! I have come to see that the message of, “I’m busy!” comes down a very long line of ancestors. There was a work ethic installed in the minds of those that came before us and busy meant you were earning your way, making hay while the sun shone, bringing home the dough, and so on.
I aspired in some sense, to be busy. And so, on my journey, I kept fairly busy, expecting a sense of satisfaction and really, wasn’t feeling it. I worked, schooled, worked part-time in addition to full-time and tried to balance all three at most times. This took my focus away from relationships and friendships; working was far more important. I was so busy being busy and yet, my direction was lacking and so were human connections.
Fast forward to July 2012 when I hit my head on a window that would forever change my life as I knew it, I became extremely busy at doing nothing much. At first, I was resistant and told myself I could fix this injury with diet and exercise and I would work less, rest in between. How could I, busy as I was, not handle this and resume the three million things I needed to do to continue being busy!? I didn’t know how to do ‘not busy.’
Finally, in therapy and a group class on dealing with Brain Injury at Parkwood Institute, I was told that I might not ever run again, let alone work full-time. This was the possibility of my new reality and I could barely comprehend. One of the tools of living with Brain Injury is what they call pacing. I shuddered at the thought of the word. I have never had time or patience for pacing. Go, go, go was a lifestyle that was now very much history as it were.
Pacing, changed my life. I had to set timers and really pay attention to my activity time duration or I would quickly find myself beyond my threshold and in an emotional, frustrated, headachy, tired and cranky like a toddler hot mess. I had to start being aware of how I was feeling and how I was managing my time. With a memory that couldn’t manage cooking two things at once and tracking times I had taken medication, I had to write a lot of things down too. Eventually, I learned how much glorious time I had to be busy before I had to shut er down for a rest.
In 2018, I earned my certification as a Health Coach. Along my journey, some of the tools I had picked up in my treatment time with brain injury came into play in learning about health and coaching. Funny, this curriculum was basically advising that I slow everything down. Now, at first I thought, things can’t get much slower than they are but guess what? Once again, I found out that by slowing things down, I actually accomplished more and became more creative and thoughtful. I developed awareness and patience for myself. I learned that my instincts were there for a reason and I learned how to listen to them.
And so, here are 5 big areas of your life that need your attention: Love, Money, Career, Health and That which is Greater than YOU. Spend less than 1 hour a day to get yourself on your way to living a fuller and more authentic life. This is the place that you START!
Five Hacks to Live Your Best Life
1. Love – Love more! Open your damn heart and be nice! Have more sex! Find a way to give back to your community that makes you feel good. Spend more time taking care of yourself through spa days, reading a good book, getting a massage. Love yourself more and the rest will follow.
Spend 5-10 minutes every day doing one of the following . . . write and speak your positive affirmations about you, journal 10 things you are happy and grateful for, have an engaged conversation with someone that goes deeper than, “How’s things?”
2. Money – Stop begrudging money, it doesn’t owe you anything! Ha-ha! Money is energy. Money is simply an energy used in the exchange of goods and services. Money is not filthy or undeserved. Money is wonderful and personally, I want lots of it . . . you should too! How many things could you do in this world to improve it for others if you had money? I know you would because I know that you are also a generous human being.
Spend 5-10 minutes a day doing one or all of the following . . . keep your receipts and expenditures accounted for, know your balances, clean out your wallet, get a savings account and make a weekly or monthly automated deposit, leave money in places where it will be unexpected for others or pay for the coffee of the person behind you in line. There are numerous ways to be smart with your money and also generous without breaking the bank.
3. Career – Well now, how to keep this short and sweet? Not doing what you love? No passion? No gain? I used a slogan once upon a time in my days of dating and this is how it went; when in doubt, get out! I had already been following this in my work life and I am no longer ashamed to admit that I’ve probably had more jobs than boyfriends. Don’t care! If it doesn’t make your heart swell to get out of bed and go to work, you need to re-examine your work life. Where there is will, there is always way!
Spend 5-10 minutes a day finding things to be grateful for about your career or your job. If you can’t find anything then start spending the time to brainstorm ideas about what makes you tick. What are the most ridiculous work life ideas you can come up with to move on to. And DO NOT scratch anything off your list. Everything is an option until it is not. Do not let fear or shitty programming make you think you can’t, because you CAN!
4. Health – Ok, so, it is true, what they say, “If you don’t have your health, you don’t have anything!” This is where I tell you not to sit around waiting for a reason like high blood pressure, acute anxiety and or depression, brain injury, cancer, heart disease, obesity, and the list goes on, to decide it is time to take care of your body. Your body is the house where your spirit resides. Respect your spirit and respect your body. All you have to do is TRY!
Spend 5-10 minutes a day moving your body if this is new for you. If you can’t do a jump squat, do a normal squat. I went from having had run 17 miles once before brain injury to having to start walking at 2 minutes a day and some days that was too much. I don’t care where you are at, there are no excuses. If moving your body isn’t new to you, I expect you’ll spend more time on this one – super! Now challenge yourself and keep moving. I am a lot tough love here because I KNOW the importance.
You should also take some time on the weekend to meal plan and prep if possible. Make it easy for yourself to make positive choices that support a healthy body and a healthy mind. Oh yeah, and drop 1 food that you currently eat right now that you know is a poor choice. Just DECIDE that you don’t eat chips or processed foods anymore. It just isn’t who you are. Once you decide this, you’d be surprised how quickly you’ll hear the voice in your head reminding you of this when you start to think you have a hankering. It’s a bullshit message your brain is sending you. Those chips or that processed cereal bar are a cue to you that your body likely needs either a nap, a break, exercise, a massage, or some other thing that will reduce your stress. And if that doesn’t quash the hunger, then drink some water and grab a snack you can feel good about. You have the POWER! Use it!
5. That which is Greater Than YOU! – When I was a child and went to Sunday school, the Sunday school teacher told 4 or 5 year old me that God was everywhere. In fact, he was right beside me, all the time. I took a look around and called bullshit in my oh so young mind. It is so funny to me now, as I look on the events of my life and KNOW that something, the universe, God, Spirit, Source, whatever you want to call it has been with me and continues to support me on my journey.
Spend 5-10 minutes a day being grateful, meditating, praying, soaking (this is a new term I picked up from a client – I love it!), reading or churching. Do whatever feels right for you and if all of this is new to you, I recommend that you get curious and figure out how to expand your spiritual horizons. Find a club that fosters an open and all loving and respecting environment. If you can’t find one, start one – I did! You won’t regret it. This also helps maintain balance in all 5 areas.
Today, I am not busy. I am productive and doing what I love. I have time for you and I have time for all that speaks to me even if it isn’t on my agenda. I live my life with intention and take inspired action and trust that what I need and want in my life, will absolutely manifest itself as I have already held a vision for it.
I am an Empowerment Coach. If you like what you’ve read here and you are curious about getting started at a life that is paced and in alignment with who you really are, let’s have a chat. Strategy sessions are always complimentary and the experience is a truly awakening one.
Love and Light,
Coach Cassandra
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